How To Make A Mud Pie
Posted: Monday, August 17, 2009
by Laura Trahan
"First you dig and get a big mud ball like this mommy," my four year old said. "then you go: pat, pat, pat. You want it to look flat like this."
As I sat on the beach feeling disgusted from sinking further down in the mud, I could not be happier. I was covered head to toe in oozing wet mud. My daughter's eyes sparkled in the sunlight as I listened to instructions to make my own mud pie, turtle castle, pizza castle and bridge.
As I looked up into the endless ocean, I couldn't help but giggle at my son. The son who normally is very fearful was all the way out at the second sand bar diving for a football with his competitive father. He was so far out the waves would crash over his head.
"Take a deep breath, Laura," I tell myself. "He is having fun or he would not be laughing with his dad."
Our trip to the beach was our last effort to hold on to summer a little longer. As I sat on the shore in the mud that was pretty icky by now, I realized how fast time goes by and wished for a moment, at that moment, time could stand still.
Not just because I feel we missed summer, but for reasons I can not seem to come to grips with in this new season of my life. I am having a hard time realizing that my son is a third grader. I am in my thirties and my daughter is a year away from kindergarten,
It seems like just yesterday I was holding that first born in my arms dreaming of the day he was self-sufficient. Now I wish he just needed me a little more throughout the day.
My daughter is quickly following spending most times instructing me instead of me instructing her.
I have continually been told by other "older" moms to "cherish each moment because it goes so fast."
I don't want it to go fast. I want to stop right here, right now. I couldn't help to think about our friend Teresa who was moving her son to another state for school. Or Bruce and Jean whose first born started college last month. Or Sue Thom's son who is serving our country. Or Lorrie who has the privilege to watch her daughter raise her own son. Or my in-laws who will put their last son in college this month and have another son marry in October. My eyes begin to water.
Why can life not stand still? I am not ready for those stages. I want these moments at the beach to last forever. I don't want to be a third graders mom. I am not old yet? I have not even found my place yet. How can I be responsible for a third grader?
I remember as a child always thinking that people in their thirties, like my own parents, were old. I don't want to be old!
For now, I am going on in denial. I am holding on to the beach. As I sat and watch my daughter sit in my husband's arms in the middle of the ocean, I couldn't help but be reminded of how God will get me through this next stage.
With tears, I am reminded of how my husband protected our daughter as the waves hit his back. She just sat in his arms protected from the waves and water laughing and giggling. I pray my heavenly father holds my family and myself in His arms during this next season of life protecting us from the crashing waves.
I pray that I can come to grips with being a mom of a third grader and that I always remember how to make a mud pie!
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Top-level comments on this article: (1 total)Wonderful, pensive and nostelgic look at life - believe me, those pages of the years will fly by so grab what you can today! MarijoThanks Marijo for the sweet comment!
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