The Christmas Present That Can Destroy A Family
Posted: Monday, January 04, 2010
by Laura Trahan
It all started innocently enough. I was super ecstatic when I unwrapped two of my presents from my mother in law. Now, after looking in the mirror, I am not so sure.
I have found myself shut in for days. My eyes adorned with two big black circles. I try to remember if at any moment someone had punched me in the eyes.
My weight is out of control, probably because of the lack of substance for the last four days. I have been hyped up on left over Christmas peanut butter bon bons and coffee. I search my head to see if I can make something nutritious out of that. At least I had peanut butter.
What was I thinking?
I know what I was thinking. I was thinking I couldn't put down the book until I knew for certain that Bella and Edward would be married. I couldn't put down the book until I knew that Renesmee would survive. I couldn't unless I knew that Victoria was destroyed. And Jacob? What was he thinking imprinting?
My own dreams were caught up in these stories. I dreamt of my own vampire self snapping at my husband for waking me before finding out my super power. Have I lost my mind? Was the gift really a gift to send me to a mental hospital?
I am wondering if this series has some sort of magical power. I notice I am paler and just like the vampires have not slept in weeks. Maybe, I was turning into a vampire as well?!?
I would like to say my husband was at least responsible. But there is no voice of reason coming from him. He is right there alongside of me caught up in the drama as well.
The lesson learned? Twilight series may not be the best gift for adults who are suppose to be responsible. I remember laughing at my girlfriends when they informed me that had skipped work to finish certain parts.
That is so insane, I remember thinking. That will never be me.
What are my kids complaining about not having clean clothes? I am sure no one will notice. That stack of laundry has to wait-I still have the happily ever after part-only 100 more pages left!
They do live happily ever after right? This is one book that I am praying is done and no more surprise sequel to add! Not sure we can go much longer locked up ignoring responsibilities.
Besides clean clothes are overrated. Wait a second, maybe they should call their Mimi, after all she is the culprit who gave me the last two books to begin with right?
Yes, I am aware I am being a little overdramatic. Maybe I have more in common with Bella then I thought. :)
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Top-level comments on this article: (3 total)Hilarious! Well done.Thanks so much Olufemi!
Hi Laura.This was fun to read ... maybe not so fun to live. :)Great job.DianneThanks Dianne!
Some one else on searchwarp referred to this series so not I really will have to check with my granddaughter to see if she has the books.Cute article. Thanks for sharing. Linda DLinda-you should check out the books, but make sure you have a lot of time because they can be addicting! Thanks for commenting!
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